Being pruned hurts...

Do you know what these are?

A mason bee outside its home in Duvall, WA

Sorry about the fuzziness of the photo but this was one busy bee! This is a native bee referred to as a Mason bee.  We love them.  One Mason bee does the job of multiple honey bees and the males do not have stingers. 

Mason bee cocoons

Every year we collect the cocoons from the tubes you can see in the photos and store them in the refrigerator.  When spring arrives we place them back outside to hatch. However, long before that we must do something that will help them.  We must prune back flowering trees and shrubs to help create the energy needed for them to produce flowers in the spring.

Have you ever been "pruned"? Don't argue too much and just breathe deep to think for a moment.  I know it might sound like a ridiculous question, but think about your life.  Try and remember a time when God chose to prune you. (Or whatever you believe in.  Maybe you believe life did it and not a being of any sort.)  

Pruned branch of a blueberry bush

The reality is that it hurts like hell.  It makes no sense.  All you know is that one minute your heart and mind were whole and the next minute a piece is missing.  You liked that piece of you.  It may not have been the best part of you, but it was still a part of you.  The next thing you know it is pruned away and you are hurt. This time when it happened to me I was SO ANGRY!!!

Pruned branch of a hydrangea bush that is 

surrounded by new growth.

As a gardener, I actually flinch when I prune a portion of a plant.  There are times when I have to prune even healthy branches so that the plant can grow healthier in the future.  It makes no sense when I say it, type it, or read it.  It makes even less sense when it is happening to my own heart and mind.  This time I believe I am becoming accustomed to what remains now that I have been "pruned." All I can do is hope for Spring, because then I see the result of the pruning.

So what do we do now? Now that we have been "pruned."  Personally I am awaiting my own personal spring.  My heart aches but I know this is temporary. Regrowth and healing are on the horizon.  This I truly believe.  With a little help...

For now I have a little recipe for you to try while you enjoy the warmth and sunshine where you are.  A friend recently asked for my recipe for taco meat.  I know it doesn't quite go with the theme of this blog entry, but when friends ask for something that will make them feel even a little bit better I try my best to respond.  She was pruned recently and feels like a Taco Tuesday will help...even if only a little.

For the rice:

1 cup long grain white rice (no matter how tempted you are do not use Basmati rice here.  It is too floral in flavor and scent.)

2 cups of a vegetable or chicken broth

1 Tbsp of tomato paste

1 Tbsp canola or vegetable oil

1 clove pressed garlic

1 tsp onion powder

In a large sauce-pan heat the oil and then add the rice.  Cook until the rice is a light brown.  Make sure to stir frequently so that all of the rice is browned.  Add garlic and cook until you can smell the garlic.  This will only take about a minute.  Add water, Caldo de Tomate, and onion powder.  Simmer until the cube is dissolved and the water had changed to a light red color.  Place lid and lower heat for 20 munites.  Once the water is evaporated, turn the heat off and leave the lid on.  Once the rest of the meal is ready fluff the rice with a fork.  You will notice there is not salt in this recipe.  The Caldo de tomate takes care of that so DO NOT add any.  You will regret it.

For the taco meat:

1lb lean ground beef

1Tbsp canola oil (please do not use olive oil here no matter how yumm-o you think it is)

1 diced yellow onion

1 diced green bell pepper

3 cloves of garlic diced

1 diced and seeded jalapeno pepper (please feel free to substitute poblano peppers here, but seeding the jalapeno pepper is a must.)

2 tsps kosher salt (DO NOT USE TABLE OR IODIZED SALT! If you own it, please get rid of it and save your taste buds!)

1 tsp feashly ground pepper

1 Tbsp Coriander

1 Tbsp Cumin

2 Tbsp chili powder

¼ tsp smoked paprika

1/8 tsp cayenne pepper

1 small can Muir Glenn Organic Chunky tomato sauce (about 4oz).  No tomato sauce? No problem!  Try tomato paste, about 2Tbsp, ¼ cup water and mix them together.

In a 12 inch skillet heat the canola oil on medium high heat, then add the ground beef.  Break up the beef and cook it until it is brown. Season with 1 tsp salt.   Remove the meat from the pan, making sure to drain the fat out of the pan, and then add the onion, green pepper and jalapeno.  Add remaining salt and cook until the vegetables are softened.  Add all seasonings to the pan and cook for one minute or until you can smell them.  Make sure to scrape up those brown bits because there is flavor attached to them.  Add the meat back in and the tomato sauce.  Mix thoroughly.  Simmer this on medium low heat for 20 minutes covered.

On the side:

Chopped green leaf lettuce

Halved grape or cherry tomatoes

Shredded sharp cheddar cheese

Sliced avocado with lemon to avoid browning

Sour Cream 

Crema fresca i

Sprouted Corn tortillas heated through if you are from the gringo side of the family

Corn tortillas from the local taqueria heated through if you are from the Mexican side of the family

Pico de gallo (homemade please)

Chopped Cilantro (except for me. I have been traumatized. I will tell you about it later.)

A Love Story

Him...
I know I told all of you I would be posting about gardening and recipes.  However, we are in the midst of weeks of rain and little has been done to the garden as of late.  While looking out at this infernal rain my husband promised deeper beds, trellises, a greenhouse, and a new trough. He is clearly insane because there is NO WAY that can happen with his work schedule. However, this promise was made out of love.  Today I am going to write about this love. I think it's important I finally write about this.

Here he is whittling. 

When we met...

There was a time in my life when I was frightened of even my own shadow.  We met during this time.  I could roar at the top of my lungs but inside I was more kitten than cat.  He was young. We were young.  Even in that time he saw past all of insecurities and straight into the heart of me.  I refused to love him back.  It is a hard truth.  In all honesty, I felt as if I was not worthy of being loved.  I had been taught that...every day of my life.  He chose to undo this teaching and loved me in spite of myself.

Walking at the park.

The choice to love...

It was not an easy choice.  He had to ask 3 times before I would say yes to marrying him.  When I tell the story to people who ask about it, I say it in a way that makes others laugh. He recently told me that although it is good to hear laughter, to him it is not funny.  I hurt him with each no, but he persisted and now I am writing my true feelings. You see I had to choose that I was worth that yes he was so longing for. Every no meant that I could live in my fear and feelings of worthlessness. It was, in fact, in a brave moment that he threw caution to the wind to ask me again that third time.  So I said yes.  You should have seen the look on his face! So here we are today. As he says it, "Two and half decades later my love and I love you more each and every day."  This is always said with a loving smile and a gentle touch to my cheek.

Holding a new arrival to our family.

Why in the world are you writing this?

I am writing this to ask all of you to choose to love one another.  It may seem silly to you after reading all of this. However, I had to choose to love.  I also had to ask for help later in our marriage to recover from my past.  I am still recovering...in the name of honesty. But that might be another blog post.  For now, I am asking anyone reading this to stop for even just a moment, breathe deep, and in your heart choose to love.   I have found it brings about kindness, compassion, care, and SO much more.  He chose to love me. I chose to love him.  That is our love story.  That is the bottom line.

Athena

Food...Glorious Food...For me and for you.

The sun came out today so I decided that today I should walk through the garden.

I went outside and discovered the following...

 MORE RADISHES!!

 The potatoes have begun to pop up.

PEAS!!!!  Can you believe it?!

Mr. Ayres and I have made a decision about how we will use every space in and around our home.  This includes the space that the HOA has rules about...

THE FRONT YARD.

The front yard continues to be a point of contention for us.  The first year we tried to grow food but then we received complaints and a notice.  We are done not growing food in spaces that we can use to provide for our family.  

This space receives the most amount of sun.  We will be able to grow strawberries.  We have planted herbs and lettuces.

It has a portion of shade in one section where we can grow our cabbages.

2 years ago we planted a small rhubarb and it cannot be seen from the road. My spouse divided it and I forgot to give him instructions as to where to place the part he divided from the original plant.

It turns out we will have more rhubarb than expected this year and are glad of it.

We have also added these...

Free!!  A generous neighbor will be moving and gave us 5 of these barrels. We have used 2 for cabbages and will use 3 for tomatoes.

I was asked recently why I choose to do all of this.  The individual was concerned about my health, which is not great at the moment.  I sat under these today to ponder my reasonings..

When we were young we were children that spent our time eating foods from a food bank.  We ate free lunches during the summer at a local elementary school.  There was many a red apple and more than a few bologna sandwiches on wonder bread. My mother made anything and everything from a can. Even if it did not come from a can,  she could make it look as if it did. We grew to have allergies to many foods and aversions to things due to circumstances I will spare you from.  We should have been spared from them as well but such is life.

So here is my honest answer and not the one that I so often give.

I grow food every year because for the first time in my life I can relinquish even a small amount of fear I have harbored my whole life.  I grow my own food because I fear hunger and this is my way to heal even a small part of my past.

My heart was full in the sunshine.  My mind and heart were honest with each other in that brief moment.  So now I have sent this upon the wind (as my Abuela once called it) in hopes of healing.

May the Lord bless you and keep you all.

Athena

Change is coming!

It is true.  Change is coming to our lovely little home.  I am not teaching right now.  I am at home trying my best to recover from a series of seizures.  It has been a road filled with doctors, medication, disappointments, decisions, and even a little hope.  Hope is what brought me back to this blog. So I decided to document what I have chosen to do as I try to heal my mind and my heart. My husband and I have decided to grow one year worth of food for our family.

So now I am faced with this...

The garden is barren right now, but there is work afoot!  In moments where I am feeling well and rested I am outside doing what I can to grow our food supply.  Today I walked out and discovered that many seeds have sprouted in the beds in spite of our recent snow.

The French radishes are coming out below the blueberry bushes.

The Swiss chard has returned and is coming up in every part of the garden.

There is so much that is coming up and giving us hope through the spring. Fennel and artichokes made their appearance last week.

These made the first appearance and brought a smile to our faces. Chives!  They are now all over the garden.  

The chives were spread with a little help...

The fruit trees have even gotten in on the action a cold spring in the PNW provides!

This year I plan on documenting our journey and the recipes that we derive from the bounty.   Our goal is to grow enough food for a family of 3 for 1 year.  It is a HUGE task and one that we are not taking on lightly.   We are even trying seeding for the first time in a small greenhouse.

As I walked through the garden today my heart filled with anticipation and joy.  It has been a long time since I have felt that. It has been a long time since my heart has felt much of anything other than fear. Today I spent time wandering, taking pictures, and praying.  It has helped, even if only a little.

Please bookmark this page and follow our journey! 

Auntie Cheena